Episode 10 - Finding Her Value Through the Infertility Journey with Lana Manikowski

By Jessica Garrison

It’s important to us at the F.E.E.L Podcast that we focus on the incredible and courageous women we’re able to speak to, including our next guest, Lana Manikowski. Her character traits include being willing, clear-minded, powerful, and capable. She joins Melissa for a conversation about infertility, a topic that isn’t usually spoken about but needs far more attention than it gets.

Lana’s major focus with self-care depends on how she wants to feel for the day. We’re always saying that different seasons require different things from you, and the same can go from day to day, depending on those specific needs. I’m glad Lana brought up this constant shift in her self-care and described how this works for her.

Boundaries have become very important for Lana’s emotional and physical health. Since Lana has a journey with infertility, she’s had to deal with people not always minding their own business. Boundaries became more clear to her when people would ask questions about having children and giving their unnecessary input. It’s no one else’s business if you choose to have children, whether it’s a conscious choice or out of your hands. This conversation is so important to not only listen to, but to have with others, and I’m glad Melissa and Lana are taking the time to bring attention to this. Their conversation also intertwines our talking points nicely and shows how connected everything is on the journey.

In supporting women, Lana says it’s important to “understand the story of yourself that you tell others.” She didn’t like the narrative she would provide when speaking about not having children, but she came to realize the power she has in her own life. I love that Lana also shared during this segment how impactful the words we use with ourselves can be, which has been mentioned in the past, but you wouldn’t believe how effective this can be.

Lana wasn’t used to feeling helpless, but infertility and treatment are completely out of your hands. No resources were given to her after she experienced this loss, and she felt alone. However, Lana wants to break this cycle and provide help to those who are experiencing the same thing. Her why is wrapped up in helping others, and this shows how dedicated she is to supporting women to live unapologetically.

Living out of your own expectations versus others’ can be difficult, especially when it comes to children. Society sets this precedent that all women should get married and have biological children, but we don’t live in that kind of world anymore. It’s a woman’s decision to get married and have children, and sometimes what a person wants doesn’t coincide with what happens. This conversation is crucial for women, we need to be normalizing these ideas.

Layers are an important aspect of Lana’s life, especially when facing this enormous obstacle in her journey. She didn’t feel connected to herself anymore and had to take the time to recognize her feelings. Asking for help is nothing to be ashamed of, and Lana shares her story of getting back to feeling like herself again in her own body.

Lana has her own coaching programs that she uses to support women in their infertility journey. There are 4 pillars she bases this on to help cover all of the multifaceted layers of this. Each case is different, but hearing Lana talk about this program, it becomes clear how passionate she is about helping women find themselves again.

I encourage everyone to check out Lana’s resources as well as engage in this conversation. It isn’t an easy one to have, but sometimes the most difficult topics are the ones worth discussing.

Ways to Engage: Infertility is more common than we think it is, with 1 in 5 women being unable to conceive in the U.S. according to the CDC. However, we don’t tend to hear a lot of conversations surrounding this topic. Why is that? Think about the pressure you have experienced as well as seen in others when it comes to having children. Feel free to share your thoughts and emotions on this multifaceted topic that I’m sure has touched each of our lives.