Episode 14 - Show Up Unfiltered as Yourself with Amita Sharma
By Jessica Garrison
Amita Sharma is an adventurous and resilient dream lover who has so much knowledge to share with us. Although everyone’s experiences are unique, there’s quite a few parallels between her story and the others we hear from women of all ages.
The one area I want to highlight from Amita’s conversation is boundaries. She reminds us that baby steps in the beginning aren’t a negative thing and your efforts deserve to be recognized. There might be some setbacks but doing what feels best for you is the healthiest and most important. Amita found herself seeking approval and trying to keep everyone around her happy…sound familiar? People pleasing is ingrained in so many of us and I guess I never really noticed until listening to so many other women who have faced it too.
In trying to please everyone else, Amita’s self care activities and boundaries were the first things to go. She realized though that as she kept giving and giving to others, they wouldn’t do the same in return. Even if she asked for something small in return, they wouldn’t do it, and that became a wake up moment for Amita.
As Amita says, every woman has a passion for something, and I think this is an incredible reminder. There is always something out there that will fill up your cup and fuel you up, even if you haven’t found it yet. Whether it be reading or exercising, Amita knows she must carve out time for her to accomplish what she wants in order to feel good.
With this realization comes boundaries, especially when people are used to you being at their beck and call constantly. It always feels like there isn’t enough time in the day to get everything done that you want to, so if it’s important to you, make the time for it. There will always be someone who pushes against your boundaries, but by standing your ground, they will have no choice but to respect your choices. It’s critical that we keep space available for ourselves to nourish our soul, and Amita is a reminder of the endless possibilities of what we can accomplish when we do this.
It’s difficult at first, especially as a people pleaser, to stand by your boundaries. Remind yourself why you set the boundary in the first place. Remind yourself that you are worth the time and deserve to be taken care of. Amita is an amazing role model, not only for her work in boundaries, but also her lovely spirit. You can check out her resources on the Embracing Layers website and share your similar experiences with us. We’re all in this together.
Ways to Engage: Write down in your planner when you want to take time for yourself, no matter what the activity may be. Treat it as a non-negotiable, and keep the date with yourself. In the future, you can reflect on how this made you feel and how pleased you were with standing by your boundaries. You are worth the time you set aside for yourself.